I was informally introduced to meditation in my late 20s. I dabbled in it but felt my mind couldn't go into the "still" mode everyone says should happen when one meditates. I wasn’t convinced the practice could help my daily life or further my spirituality. The truth was, I was too busy living life as a typical young woman in my late 20s, between having fun, starting a new career, and dating!
Side note: During those times, I experienced two out-of-body experiences while sleeping. The first time, I was afraid, so I shared my experience with the person who introduced me to meditation. He told me not to be frightened. Should it happen again, he said to tell myself it was ok and allow the experience to be a fun discovery. That night, I experienced it again. This time, I remembered his instructions, so I felt less anxious and could stay out of my body slightly longer.
At this moment, you're probably wondering what I saw during those experiences.
They both start the same way. I heard a low buzzing sound that became increasingly loud. My view became a tunnel vision, and things around me sped up. Imagine being on the ride “Space Mountain” at Disneyland. I felt a pulling sensation until everything suddenly stopped and went still. Silence and darkness took over. All around me was space. I was floating slowly in space. As quickly as I was pulled up there, I felt I was suddenly pulled back down. I believe that's when my spirit came back into my body. The jolt woke me up. The second time, I could stay in space a little longer than the first time and was able to observe space and stars a little longer.
During this period, I saw many visions while in meditation, which I immediately dismissed and chastised my mind for being too creative! By the way, my mind has never gone still or silent during meditation, not even today. Describing meditations that way could be misleading and deter those whose minds don’t go silent to think they must be doing it wrong and may deter them from continuing the practice. I think everyone’s experience is different, and we should honor that. Perhaps my mind will eventually go still when I am older. I’ll let you know when that happens. Ha! Maybe stillness has a sliding scale, which means something different to each person. For me, stillness equals clarity. (Side note: I have been diagnosed with High-Functioning Attention Deficit Disorder in my early 30s, so having a silent mind may be a tall order for someone like me.)
After those few short years in my 20s, I stopped meditating for over twenty years. I only restarted the practice during COVID-19 in 2020 when the world stopped. Like everyone else, my anxiety kicked into high gear during that time, and I was reintroduced to the practice by my new friend, Dr. Smita Garg. They say, “When you are ready to learn, the teacher will appear.”
Now I realize that even in my 20s, I could quickly enter into a deep meditative state and do not need a long time to “get there” once I begin. What I saw and felt in meditations and dreams is essential information for my life or for those around me. I don’t often remember dreams, but when I do, I know they carry important messages. In dreams and meditation, my guide communicates with me through imageries and telepathy, not audibly. But once in a while, I do hear instructions loud and clear. I love those types of dreams; the messages are so direct! In my prayers, I ask my guide to be very clear so I can understand her more easily.
I never shared this information publicly before today because I feared being judged as a working professional. I don’t have this fear anymore because I am no longer afraid of the consequences of people’s judgments. It is also part of my calling to "walk the talk." To simply live my best life and have joy. That is it!
Stepping into our truth sets us free!
Sharing my journey is one part of my work. You’ve found this story because something led you here. I hope these words will resonate with you and accompany you on your path to self-discovery.
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